I have recently learned that…
I am a habitual seeker.
This needs further explanation.
For much of my life, I have been profoundly inquisitive, wanting to understand the mysteries of the world, introspective, and intrigued by understanding Creation behavior.
Sadly, as I had entered into adulthood and traumas and tragedies began to sink into my body and my mind, I went into deep discernments regarding if being a seeker was healthy and serving me as an empath.
While there are a lot of complex layers to this discernment process and how enlightenment spirituality has shown up for me in my life, my intention for this post is to simply offer up the conversation as if I were meeting an old friend for tea.
Thank you for being willing to show up with me for this vulnerable conversation...
Enlightenment Spirituality: What Does this Look Like?
I have felt the cool autumn breeze across my cheek as if guiding me to a safe harbor during a quiet trail walk.
I know the kinesthetic sensation that envelopes me when I allow the depths of emotions and wisdom to be expressed in its truest form.
I have heard the faint whisper of my ancestors offering their wisdom to me during times when the shadows in my own life were too thick for me to see the path ahead.
All of these are symbols of how the process of enlightenment spirituality has shown up in my life: whether I was mindful of it at the time or not.
I have faced the reality of death starting at an early age. My sophomore year of high school a classmate of mine had died in a tragic car accident, and I didn’t know it at the time, but that night it happened, I was driving home from the dance studio and I had passed right by the tragic accident site.
I had a strange sense wash over me as I drove by, and later that evening I would find out why…
Since then, I’ve faced the death and grief process in various ways from both family members, friends and military connections, all that have had a significant impact on my perception of what my life is supposed to be about.
Now, here I am before you, sharing this idea of enlightenment spirituality… we’ve come a long ways haven’t we?
Let me breakdown what this concept is and how it is showing up for me right now…during another season of what may be end-of-life transformation…
Enlightenment Spirituality is, in essence, the process of using action to explore the depths of divinity for the purpose of introspective growth and servitude.
While there is a tremendous amount of opportunity for this definition to be subjective, I will break down what the above statement means for me.
First is the idea of servitude: while many often shy away from this term, I fully and wholeheartedly proclaim that I KNOW my life is dedicated, enslaved, and in service of something much larger, external, and outside of my control.
Basically, simply put: I am a voluntary, surrendered slave to a being that does not need me.
Next, I had to examine introspective growth. Now, we often hear about “personal growth” and “self-help” type of culture, and introspective growth is different.
While I am evolving internally and using discernment to grow, my growth is not for an external expression. I chose not to grow so that the external world could “see” how I have changed and been influenced by my Creator and by my guides. I chose to use introspective growth so that my soul received the energy. Meaning, if I used all my energy for outward expression, there was nothing left for my soul to use to heal and grow. (pouring from an empty cup; sound familiar?)
I could care less about seeing someone who bought 20 self-help books and they are “showing” the world their knowledge.
What I care about, is witnessing an internal transformation that is so far at the soul-depth that I could do nothing but be in the presence of something truly powerful.
THAT is the type of sensation I want running through my veins.
Enlightenment Spirituality: How Can I Welcome This in My Life?
Now back to this end-of-life transformation. As I sit here now and think about the anguish and pain that death brings to my soul, I feel slightly different than all the other times before.
I feel this presence, while very faint, but nonetheless its existence undeniable, that there is something for me to LISTEN to.
All the times before I have fought so strongly to DO something during this time of pain, frustration, utter confusion, and I am being called to LISTEN.
To listen to the lessons and wisdom that I truly believe is ONLY taught when facing the inevitable reality of death of this life.
This has been and will continue to be a life long journey of showing up for myself and for the vulnerability it takes to surrender your life to something greater than yourself.
So, this current list below definitely is not all inclusive, but here are some ways I am showing up for my transformation during this season of my life (while embracing enlightenment spirituality).
- Removing cultural shame from emotional expression
- Setting and maintaining healthy boundaries to protect my soul and wellness
- Removing toxic people and behaviors from influencing my authenticity
- Incorporating self-care resources in my daily life
- Focus on the BASICS
- Adopting minimalism as a lifestyle and mindset
For me, there is definitely something soul-honoring, that I have learned along the way to setting healthy boundaries and learning that saying “no” to people and behaviors that are toxic, is necessary!
There is probably a lot more than I could say, and perhaps will say, in time. But for now, this piece of the re-discovery and re-birth process is making its debut into the world.
Perhaps the closing thought here is this:
The action of habitual seeking that I once believed was how I was to live out my life for those around me, I came to realize did not allow me to “be alive” as I am truly called to be.
What it takes to feel alive, is far much greater of an effort than I once realized…
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